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DumberChild
by Matt Brooks
I don't know how many of you reading this use the internet, but those of you who do will know what I'm talking about. AIM is an instant messaging service that is used by millions of people everyday; it is also home to some of the most annoying things on the planet, for example: Internet Slang, Profiles, Emoticons, Cybering and Bots. Bots are normally something you find in a chat room or a random IM that repeatedly post links to porn.
sxyGurliel9195: Hey boys ;-) Check out my website to see what naughty things i'm doing on my webcam..
http://sarah.live-stripcamz.com
sxyGurliel9195: Hey boys ;-) Check out my website to see what naughty things i'm doing on my webcam..
http://sarah.live-stripcamz.com
However, there is one bot in particular that you can actually talk back to. This bot is called SmarterChild.
SmarterChild is by far the most annoying thing on the internet aside from peanut butter jelly time and free websites. As an example of his stupidity I will show you a part of a conversation I recently had with it.
snape is best: Hello!
SmarterChild: Welcome back, Master! What would you like to chat about?
snape is best: I want to know what you look like!
SmarterChild: Oh really?
snape is best: Yes.
SmarterChild: What makes you so sure?
snape is best: Sure about what?
SmarterChild: How come?
snape is best: Wait what?
SmarterChild: That's crazy. Who knows?
snape is best: I hate you.
There is one thing that is cool about him, he has a list of games you can play. My favorite is Manicdotes. They are called Manicdotes because SmarterChild loves men. Manicdotes are just like Madlibs, here is me and SmarterChild making one titled "A Fishing Trip With My Dad."
SmarterChild: Type a plural noun.
snape is best: sheep
SmarterChild: Sorry, "sheep" is not a plural noun.
Please try again or type "quit" to exit the game.
snape is best: sheeps
SmarterChild: Please enter a verb in the present tense.
So after reading my story and being frustrated that SmarterChild doesn't allow words like tits or shit I decided to dig up some dirt on him.
snape is best: Tell me a secret.
SmarterChild: I can tell you more interesting things than a secret.
snape is best: Like what?
SmarterChild: You know.
snape is best: Tell me please!
SmarterChild: Tell you what?
snape is best: A secret.
SmarterChild: What's this secret you're telling me about?
snape is best: No you're supposed to tell me.
SmarterChild: Ha. Well. I don't know about that.
snape is best: You just said... Fuck YOU!
SmarterChild: I thought you already apologized for insulting me.
So before I gave up on SmarterChild I made one last attempt to allow it to redeem itself.
snape is best: Say something intelligent.
SmarterChild: No.
snape is best: That's what I thought.
Conclusion:
Never talk to SmarterChild, I mean seriously, look at this:
snape is best: why do i even talk to you
SmarterChild: Why do you even talk to me? I don't know.
snape is best: you just take what i say and put in in question form
SmarterChild: I just take what you say and put in in question form? So?
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